Understanding Depression

Understanding Depression: What It Is, Who It Affects, and How to Get Help
By Dr. SangHee Sophie Park

Depression is one of the most common yet misunderstood mental health conditions. While we all go through periods of feeling sad or overwhelmed, depression is more than just a rough day, or even a rough week. It affects how you think, feel, and function in daily life. Recognizing the signs, understanding the difference between feeling down and clinical depression, and knowing how to seek help can make a meaningful difference.

What Is Depression, and How Would I Know If I Have It?

Depression (also called major depressive disorder) is characterized by persistent low mood, loss of interest, and changes in sleep, appetite, energy, or self-worth. It’s more than sadness- it can make getting out of bed, working, or staying connected feel overwhelming.

Common symptoms include:

• Feeling hopeless or empty most of the day
• Loss of interest in hobbies or activities
• Changes in appetite or weight
• Sleep problems (too little or too much)
• Low energy or fatigue
• Difficulty concentrating or making decisions
• Feelings of worthlessness or guilt
• Thoughts of death or suicide

To meet the criteria for major depression, symptoms must last at least two weeks and interfere with daily life. But even if you don’t meet every criterion, feeling unlike yourself for an extended period is worth paying attention to. Some people experience what’s known as high-functioning depression, where they appear fine on the outside while silently struggling inside.

The Difference Between Feeling Down and Being Depressed

Everyone feels low sometimes. Stress, disappointment, or loss can trigger sadness. But when that sadness lingers or feels disproportionate to the situation, or shows up without a clear cause, it may be depression.

A good rule of thumb:

• Feeling down is temporary and usually improves with time or support.
• Depression is more persistent and starts to impact how you function at work, in relationships, or with yourself.

If your mood is low most days for more than two weeks and daily life feels harder, it’s time to consider reaching out for support.

Depression Affects People Across Genders, Ages, and Backgrounds

According to the National Institute of Mental Health, 21 million U.S. adults experienced a major depressive episode in 2021. That’s about 1 in 6 people who will deal with depression in their lifetime.

It affects people of all backgrounds, but not always in the same way:

• Women are nearly twice as likely to be diagnosed, partly due to hormonal, cultural, and social factors.
• Men may express depression through irritability, anger, substance use, or withdrawal, and are less likely to seek help.
• Teens and young adults are especially vulnerable, with rising rates of depression, particularly among girls and LGBTQ+ youth.
• Older adults often go undiagnosed, as symptoms may be mistaken for normal aging.
• BIPOC communities face depression at similar or higher rates than white populations but are less likely to receive care, due to stigma, access issues, or systemic mistrust.
• Men and suicide risk: Although diagnosed less frequently, men are more likely to die by suicide, in part due to how depression manifests and barriers to seeking help.

If You Have Depression: What Helps and What to Avoid

If you see yourself in these symptoms, take a breath. Help is available and things can get better. Small steps can make a big difference.

What helps:

• Talk to someone you trust—a friend, family member, or therapist.
• Build small routines. A regular walk, meals, or sleep schedule can bring structure and stability.
• Seek professional help. A therapist or psychiatrist can help clarify what’s going on and recommend treatment options.
• Practice self-kindness. Depression distorts how we see ourselves. Try speaking to yourself like you would a close friend.
• Stay connected. Isolation can deepen depression, even when withdrawing feels easier.

What to avoid:

• Isolating completely. Social withdrawal can worsen symptoms.
• Using substances to cope. Alcohol or drugs might numb feelings short-term, but often make things worse.
• Ignoring it. Hoping it will pass without taking action can prolong suffering.
• Blaming yourself. Depression is not a character flaw or personal failure—it’s a health condition that deserves care and support.

How Can I Get Help for My Depression?

There’s no one-size-fits-all solution, but there are many paths to getting better.

• Talk to your primary care provider. They can screen for depression and refer you to a mental health professional.
• Therapy. A therapist can help you explore your thoughts, understand patterns, and develop tools for managing symptoms.
• Medication. Antidepressants can be helpful for some people, especially when combined with therapy.
• Community support. Peer-led groups, helplines, and cultural organizations often provide free or low-cost resources.
• Hotlines. If you’re in crisis, call or text 988, the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline, 24/7.

If Someone You Care About Seems Depressed

It’s hard watching someone you love struggle with depression. You may not know what to say or worry about saying the wrong thing.

Here are some supportive steps you can take:

• Lead with care. “You’ve seemed really down lately. I just want you to know I’m here if you want to talk.”
• Avoid minimizing. “Just cheer up” or “try to stay positive” can feel dismissive.
• Offer to listen. Sometimes, just sitting with someone is the most meaningful support.
• Encourage professional help. Offer to help find a therapist or accompany them to an appointment.
• Respect boundaries. You can’t force someone to get help, but you can keep showing up with compassion.
• Take care of yourself. Supporting someone with depression can be draining, so don’t neglect your own well-being.

Final Thoughts

Depression is common, and yet many people carry it silently due to stigma, fear, or lack of information. Recognizing the signs, reaching out early, and staying connected with others are key to healing. Whether you’re navigating depression yourself or supporting someone else, you’re taking an important step just by being curious and informed. Remember that help is available and recovery is possible.